offdutyartist

Hello Stranger

2010-12-31T12:22:00.006-05:00

Yesterday, out of curiosity, I checked the stats on this blog. Surprisingly, it still gets a significant amount of traffic, even though it is seriously lacking in new content. I think my brother Jeff has something to do with that. If you found your way here through his website or blog, I am sorry I don't have any fun mathy or computational tidbits to share here.

It has been almost three years since my last post, and needless to say I have moved on to other things. I have lost an organ and some extra pounds, forgiven my knee, tried to hone my green thumb, gained a love of riding my bike while toting my camera, and started a new blog, Picture Pedaler. Come over and check it out.

This blog will remain here as an archive of my last couple years in New York, a still current love of art and photography and a small glimpse into my deep, and not so deep, ponderings. Mainly, I come around to look at the photos. I am not the most proficient photographer, but recording my thoughts with the camera is a huge part of who I am. I also continue to collect images of strangers. They are piled in boxes, bags and notebooks. Maybe I am collecting lost souls, or maybe I just see the humanity contained within a single snapshot. In this digital world, I worry about words and images disappearing. But I continue to be completely present.

Pictures From Pauline's Antique Store in Alameda

2008-01-30T20:13:00.000-05:00

2008!

2008-01-01T15:09:00.001-05:00

Recently Found

2007-12-07T14:56:00.001-05:00

Photo cigarette cards from the Henry Clay and Bock Co. Havana Cuba
Photos from Miss Cecil Davis studio

Circle, Square, Ladybugs and Lonesome George

2007-11-30T22:03:00.000-05:00

On a recent bike ride we met Lonesome George along the path. When my camera failed to turn into a cracker dispenser, he waited patiently while I took his picture.As we biked on we came across a bit of grassy geometric graffiti. If my brother were a graffiti artist or picnic table defacer, this would be the kind of mark he would make.On a walk with Don and Subburdenite in Mount Diablo State Park, we stumbled upon this ladybug nest. I had initially picked up the pine cone due to its grand size and was startled by its movement. I then realized this was home to one of my favorite bugs. There must have been thousands of them under multiple cones. We tried to take pictures without disturbing them too much. Don took this one.After, I kept humming an unknown ladybug song. I finally remembered; it was this fine little ditty.

Near Half Moon Bay

2007-11-15T09:55:00.001-05:00

Oil and Water

2007-11-11T12:07:00.000-05:00

As I plan a drive to the beach, I am saddened by the wildlife being threatened by a horrendous accident of man. Oil does not mix with water and it destroys the flight and feeding of the birds. Fuel threatens the life of this beautiful bay. Yet, I turn, seeking a beach that is clean, where my dreams can be my dreams and reality is behind me. However, my sight does not deceive me. Thick and glassy, it taints my newly blue sky, trajectory stilted.

Antiquing by the Bay

2007-11-04T23:31:00.000-05:00

Afternoon at the Pumpkin Patch

2007-10-22T03:14:00.001-04:00

This picture has nothing to do with pumpkins but is here because Joy was right when she said "oh great, tomorrow I am going to show up on someone's blog. " After a great meal, she, Don and Pete were sharing at 80's metal memories via YouTube.
Now on to the pumpkins....

After a morning at the farmers market, we drove to the Pumpkin Patch in the Cool Bus. Michelle gave a hearty hello to all the passers by.
I am not used to driving a bus and accidentally ran over this sad pumpkin.
Good thing there were all these others to choose from.
But which one?!
I stopped to say howdy to the pumpkin man and his mummy.
And also watched as this young boy said hello to the nice kitty.
Lastly, nothing says Halloween like a llama.

Bouncing Baggage

2007-10-08T13:36:00.000-04:00

Every work day for 63 months I saved rubber bands from the office mail. It was partly a goofy project and partly a compulsive way to count the days. The ball grew at alarming rates to the point of embarrassment. A private ritual became public when I could no longer fit the ball in my desk drawer. It was not cool, interesting or charming but a weight that lost its bounce as its circumference grew.
When I finally quit that job, I took the ball with me. It was heavy and awkward but somehow a part of me. I had plans to cast it in metal, take x-rays of its interior, slice through the center. Somehow the dissection would give clues to my nature and perhaps the depth of my frustration at the time.

Now it is time to let the ball go, leave behind its symbolism and be free of its weight.

Box Number One

2007-09-24T17:58:00.000-04:00

Having moved a lot, I often have trouble with the question of where I am from. My first instinct and answer is always Tennessee. This always brings blank stares, and here in NY the response "Wow, that must have been a culture shock when you moved here." Do most people only move once and therefore assume that the place one is from is where one has always been up until the current locale?

This always sparks a longer conversation/explanation that includes Franklin, Nashville, Atlanta, Santa Barbara, Kansas City, Buffalo, San Francisco, Boston, and Brooklyn. By the time I make it to Brooklyn the inquirer has fallen asleep, lost interest, has a puzzled look or may have even walked away.

Does my wandering nature create the perception that I am fickle? In that fickleness, have I lost a sense of place? My good friend Cecil was once asked by his young daughter "Where is home?" Cecil's response was "Home is where you hang your hat." His daughter quickly rebutted " What if I don't have a hat?" I have some hats that I have carried with me since leaving home at 18. I take them with me to every place I live. I hang at least one up at each location. I never thought of it as a symbolic gesture before, but it is a collection of random objects that defines the space I call home.

Since we are hiring movers, we have had trouble figuring out what to insure. Unfortunately there is no monetary value placed on sentimentality. But sentimentality and memory is the majority of what marks our belongings. Without a story, they are just objects. Collectively they start to define our personalities, give clues to our nature. Not to mention thousands of photos, if lost would start to chip away at the memory triggers that help guide us forward.

Moving is always an adventure and D just pointed out that, as I pack, I am smiling. When I was a kid I dreamed of moving from Tennessee and always hoped that my father could transfer somewhere new. It would mean new people, a new landscape, new adventure. As an adult I guess that is what I have been seeking. For now, and hopefully for many years to follow, I am ready to call California home.

Westward Home, East Bay Bound

2007-09-18T21:13:00.000-04:00

With Subburdenite off house sitting in San Francisco, Champ played host while I searched for our new home in the east bay. After days of searching and successfully securing our new apartment, I spent some time exploring the east bay parks.

Joaquin Miller Tilden This young buck was meandering on the roadside. He stood still as a statue as I took his picture and then ran off into the woods. After my adventures in the hills, I drove over to Cesar Chavez .These little guys call the park home.Later, over in San Francisco, M and I explored the Presidio and found a bit of quiet here.One thing I love about the bay area is all the flowers that seem to bloom year round. I plan to plant many flowers of my own. Saturday we headed for Bonny Doon and stopped at the beach along the way. With all the running around, the Subburdenmobile needed a car wash. After a great farm fresh meal the night before, we decided to go get some farm fresh produce at the Temescal Farmers Market.
We sat and drank our Blue Bottle coffee, ate our Donna's Tamales and made faces at each other.
As funny as we tried to be, we decided that we needed a good laugh and went to see Super Bad. It was super funny and a super sweet film.

Back in NY, the stress of searching has been relieved, and in a month, DB and I will call the east bay our new home!

Weeds, Quakes and Fissures

2007-09-12T18:27:00.002-04:00

My husband once had a dream that we lived in an apartment with one side in New York and one side in California. I imagine the New York side sinking into the East River as the California side rises, inching its way across the plains until reaching the edge of the other coast. My mind has been inching slowly for years.
Some friends gave us some drink coasters that had images of each coast and were properly labeled: East Coaster or West Coaster. For a long time D claimed use of the East Coaster and I recently noticed that the West Coaster sat on his desk stained from many days, perhaps months, of use.

Like the ones I plucked from my grandmother's garden with a butter knife, I am like a weed that keeps coming back. Ultimately, and without question, I am always drawn back to my adopted home state. I never have known why. I trust this feeling because it has never subsided.
New York is an island that moves swiftly and without reason. If you stop too abruptly it might swallow you whole, no apology. It pulls at you and somehow you remain standing, occasionally tripping and bruising your knees. You walk on as if nothing has happened, because it is what you expect. It dresses up like a fancy lady with ill fitting shoes. It walks heavy and hard and you dodge its shoving motion, but still, it propels you. This time it propels you to leave. You smile and say goodbye to "the city", a high maintenance friend with lots to offer and not enough to give.
In California you feel more like yourself, more alive. As you rest calmly, the earth quakes. It is familiar but still astounds you. You are more forgiving of its faults, not the kind that split the earth, but the kind that could create fissures in your soul.

Maine A-yuh

2007-09-06T19:00:00.000-04:00

California: No Words Just Pictures

2007-08-24T01:25:00.000-04:00

August Weekend

2007-08-12T18:08:00.001-04:00

I am continuing to test out my new camera, trying to see what it can do. It has been years since I looked through a viewfinder so I am getting used to that again. Sometimes it is hard to tell if things are in focus. I wonder if I need glasses or just more patience before pushing the shutter. Overall I like what I see so far and I am having fun with it. All the shots below were taken this weekend in Brooklyn.

And this one was taken in a photo booth at Bubby's in Dumbo.

Can you see inside my soul?

2007-08-10T12:41:00.000-04:00

Well, I think my new camera can.
It was a gift from this wonderful man,
Who makes me very happy with or without the fancy camera.
Our 10th anniversary is coming up but we have known each other much longer than that. DB dives into the past over on his blog. We look so young and we were.

Around Here

2007-08-04T13:33:00.001-04:00

Wessel's Wisdom

2007-07-21T09:47:00.000-04:00

My favorite professor from graduate school, Henry Wessel, always has the perfect words to describe what it means to be a photographer.

"In a still photograph you basically have two variables, where you stand and when you press the shutter. That’s all you have."

Henry Wessel Las Vegas No. 24 2002

His words are often matter of fact but are so genuine and passionate, always unveiling something quite inspiring. His actions are based a pure response to what he is seeing and the reality that what is before him is fleeting. "Photography is the ordering of chaos." For more of his contagious artistic enthusiasm look at this video made by KQED's Spark.

Earth Shattering Doughnuts

2007-07-20T17:20:00.000-04:00

In Oakland CA this morning, Dream Fluff was shaken right out of the donut shop. Many Oakland residents lost power and some hairspray fell off the shelf at the local drug store. Some are frightened by these unsteady lands but I am drawn to them. I don't mind picking a little glass out of my honey glazed confection or doing a little dance while I select my shampoo from the bottles tossed about the floor.
Last time I lived in California, the only thing that continually made me a little ill at ease was the earthquake safety videos sold at the grocery store check out. They were a constant reminder that I was ill prepared, but not so much that I ever purchased one.

Up to 1976

2007-07-18T12:04:00.000-04:00

I often post images of my thrift store and flea market finds but this time I have chosen to show you images from my past, from a yet unfinished photo album. Actually, I think I started the album 6 years ago. I ran out of photo mounting corners and archival paper and then put my project in a box not to be uncovered again until a few weeks ago.

Here are my brother and I practicing the art of chalk drawing. Notice his side is full of figure eights while I am content with abstraction.
Our favorite past time was rolling around in an old oil barrel. It is one of my first fond memories. I have no idea where this football gear came from. My brother was never that sporty so I doubt it was his, or at least not for long. The clothes might have been. I seem anxious to get the helmet off my head, but look at that cool matchbox car on the floor.
I remember loving this outfit which now to me looks like a big lacy bib. It goes so nicely with my macaroni necklace. Looks like we are about to head out on a road trip. I wonder if my parents took this picture and were silently giggling or if they thought I looked cute. Maybe they were happy because I was happy wearing this nutty getup. Plus I loved to ride around in the car. back then I remember looking forward to the day that I could finally see over the dashboard. Ummm. Who let that kid play with the kitty cat? I seem clueless to the fragility of life but enthusiastic nonetheless. If being a superhero was only as simple as it was back then. Just a simple towel tossed about my shoulders left me feeling on top of the world. I wonder if I chose this spot to have my picture taken in my lovely striped sweater or was it "chosen" for me.
You can't really see it but I am blowing on a dandelion here. I think that came with a wish. I wonder what I was wishing for. These are the lady sailors of the corn.
My grandmother sent me this raincoat and my mom took this picture of me to use a reference for an early portrait painting.This was the year I had to sing in the school Christmas pageant. I was one of the leads. I don't remember really even enjoying singing or acting, but I did a lot of it that year. My mom made the lovely faux denim leisure suit. And this corduroy one which was the same year. I love that the back side of the pants are a different color than the front. That pink hippo was my favorite stuffed animal, a gift from my aunt Barbara.
The images here stop at second grade. Maybe I will share my awkward preteen years and teen years later.

Summer Art Viewing

2007-07-15T15:09:00.000-04:00

On Friday I went to see a photography exhibition suggested by a friend and stayed in Chelsea for a bit to see what there was to see.

Chris Jordan at Von Lintel was the first stop. His work reflects massive human consumption, the incredible amounts of waste we create, along with the environmental effects of our overuse.
I did appreciate the concept behind the work but much prefer the rawness of his older work.Next was Chen Jigang at China Square. This gallery is in a brand new building that was still under construction the day of my visit. Many of these large scale images were of seemingly abandoned industrial sites and included a solitary figure, which accentuated the massiveness of the structures as well as the solemn effect created by their desolate state.
At Marianne Boesky, Thomas Flechtner was showing beautiful images of manufactured landscapes grown for profit.
I then happily stumbled upon and Exhibition of Morton Bartlett's sculptures and photos at Julie Saul Gallery. If you have never heard of Bartlett I would describe him as a comrade (not literally but figuratively) of Henry Darger. He was educated at Harvard and made these sculptures and photographed them in the privacy/isolation of his home. Although briefly acknowledged in life, much praise for his work came after his death.
I traveled in and out of other galleries quickly giving a positive nod or dismissive shrug. Yancey Richardson always has something of interest and I never leave disappointed. This time it was a group show called Easy Rider, all photos about road trips.

William Eggleston
Ernst Hass

Filmmakers Making Babies

2007-07-11T17:15:00.001-04:00

Lately, the ladies of the New York documentary film world have been busy making babies. They had some help from their artful husbands but the ladies carry the wee ones. A couple weeks ago I attended an all girl shower for Kristen.
Beth made this beautiful blanket that was quickly coveted by the youngest shower guest.
This past weekend we helped to host a shower for Beth and Jim. Sophia helped bake and needed the bread to soak up the onion fumes that were tearing up our eyes. Succesfully baked, Toby cut up the Spinach Brownies (not brownies at all, but an egg dish)
Don and I got ready for the guests to arrive.
The guests of honor, Beth and Jim.Jim shows us his pregnant belly.The rest of us fill our belly's with Jeni's Ice Cream. Jeni has a little one on the way as well.
George is fashionably late and has just come from mowing the lawn at his new country house. We all made iron on onsies, an idea stolen from Bill and Laura's shower.Sophia and Penny take a break on the lawn before the presents are opened. Jim documents the documenter. The baby is already a black belt at karate.
We all watch as the gifts are opened, and, no matter how hard we try not to, we all collectively AAAWWWW . This European contraption is a bathtub which can later be used as a stool. George intensely studies the instructions.
Our gift was this monkey, along with some books,
one of which was "I Want to Be a Road Builder" with the main characters being Beth and Jim. It was found in an antique store in east Texas.

So Long Una

2007-07-05T13:59:00.000-04:00

My Great Aunt Una passed away on July 3rd. Although I did not know her well, I did respect and like her very much. She had a long and adventurous life. I hope that my life can be as full and exciting as hers. When I saw her in summer of 2005 for her 90th birthday it was obvious that she had many admirers, friends and family alike. When I was in college Una and her sister Iris bought me a car. I had been in an accident in my old car, a 79 chevy malibu, which was totaled. My dad had, in casual conversation, told them about my car and they, no strings attached, paid for the replacement, a used nissan sentra. At the time I wondered why these women who I barely knew would do such a thing. Now I think it must have had something to do with the fact that I was a young lady who needed her independence and freedom. These two sisters traveled all over the world and neither were ever married. They were strong and smart and incredibly sassy. I wish I had gotten to spend more time with my relatives of this generation, but now I learn from these images that documented their lives. Una insisted that I take these pictures home with me and I am so happy I did. Here she is:

As a student - She is the one with the bow around her neck.
As a teacher
As Rosie the Riveter with her sister Iris who was the family genealogist.
With her siblings. That handsome fellow in the back is my grandfather.Pouring tea for a friend

As gardenerLover of the sea
Swimming with my Aunt Barb and my dad
As photographer
Bowler
At 90, summer 2005. The tacks on the background map represent all the places she traveled.
So long Una. You were a great old gal with a youthful and giving heart. You will be missed.

Grand Days of Old

2007-07-01T09:42:00.001-04:00

My mom's cousin sent me some more photos of the family. Among them were these of my grandparents. Here they were on their honeymoon in Big Bear, CA.
It is good to see the love of donuts goes way back.
My grandmother was quite a looker, so stylish even while roughing it.
This was the store run by my great-grandmother in Washington state.
When my grandmother was young she lived in LA and was a seamstress for Edith Head. This image must have been taken at her apartment building. My mom was born in LA but moved around a lot because her dad was in the air force.
We have officially planned a family reunion for Spring of 2008. Although my grandmother and her brothers have passed, the rest of us are looking forward to meeting the relatives we have never met. My grandfather still lives in California with his second wife. He is 90.

Getting to the Bottom of This

2007-06-24T08:54:00.000-04:00

Weekender

2007-06-22T15:30:00.000-04:00

Last weekend my great friend Ms. World Book visited for a couple days. Many times when I am with her I forget to take pictures. That doesn't happen to me too often, but I think we get busy catching up and I forget to pull out the camera. I did take just a few.

On Saturday we headed for our much beloved Vegetarian Dim Sum House. Our visits there have become a ritual and we order pretty much the same thing every time, wavering only slightly on the amount.

Our plan had been to go to Chelsea and look at galleries (like good little artists). Instead we went to The Garage flea market on 25th street. Ms. W found some nice shirts and I fetched my usual stack of old photos. We dodged a big rainstorm which broke quickly to sunny sky.
On the way to Printed Matter we came across the filming of Revolutionary Road, but we did not see Leonardo DiCaprio.
Can I get one of these cars, because I sure would like one, this color.Once at the bookstore, we discovered signed copies of our friend Alice's book. I happily bought a copy and dreamed of having my own images in print.
We moved on to Billy's to rest our feet and eat cupcakes.
I was very excited about eating dessert before dinner.
In my much exhausted quest for good Mexican food in NY, we waited too long at La Palapa in the East Village. The noise level was extreme but the food was good, not great. A few more veggie options would have been nice.

Sunday, we grabbed some coffee and headed to Matt and Maureen's last tag sale in NY. They are headed to MI in two days and will be sorely missed. I bought some old glass bottles that I added to my small collection.

We withstood the heat to go to Williamsburg to see the Renegade Craft Fair. It was almost too hot to do anything but apply sunscreen and drink water, but we saw it all. I coveted some jewelry and ended up purchasing two t-shirts for Don. After lunch Ms. World Book headed home. I will see her next in CA, already 13 years from when we first met.

Great Grandphotos

2007-06-10T21:47:00.000-04:00

My mom has recently found some long lost relatives. They weren't so much lost, as out of touch or unaware of one another. One of her cousins has a small collection of family photos that we never knew existed. With them come stories and other cousins. He sent a sampling of images in a recent email and this on is the prize. These are my great grandparents and their three children. My grandmother is the little girl and this is a travel document from their journey to the states from Berlin in 1925. My mom's cousin has kindly and enthusiastically scanned the rest of the images and has promptly sent them to me. I anxiously await their arrival and I look forward to meeting my "new" relatives.

Skulls, Angels and Big Red

2007-06-06T22:11:00.000-04:00

I got a part time job in Lower Manhattan and work right across from Trinity Church. Because there aren't many fun places to eat or sit and relax, I have chosen the cemetery as my new lunch break spot. It is peaceful, well gardened and they even set up tables closer to the church for those who might be a bit skiddish about dining with the dead. I sit on the benches that are inside with the gravestones and under the beautiful shade trees. Yesterday I enjoyed the sandwich I brought from home and then took some pictures.

After work I took notice of some of the public art in the area. I may not be the biggest fan of big red sculpture (unless its a Calder) but I am still glad it is here.
Red Cube Isamu Noguchi 1968

Right across the street from the cube is this piece by Mark di Suvero

And in an adjacent couryard, there is this wonderful piece Group of Four Trees by Jean Dubuffet.

City Swelter, Southern Recollection, Foggy Aspirations

2007-06-02T19:32:00.000-04:00

It is June in New York and somehow it seems like the hottest day of a southern summer, the kind I used to survive by consuming tray after tray of ice cubes. Sweat beads up on my brow and my head fills with yellow pollen. It makes my throat close up and I have trouble breathing. Never having had allergies before, I make the assumption that this is what it feels like. My toes are covered with black soot that coats all sandaled feet during the city summer.

For years I boasted of liking the heat and was proud of my experience with real southern humidity. “Oh, this is nothing“ came out of my mouth often. Many long summers of high heat and humidity in TN helped define a part of who I was. My slow pace and my monotone speech could be attributed to the south. Even though I never felt southern, it was these characteristics that I claimed.

Tennessee summers were filled with lightning bugs and honeysuckle, bare feet and bubbling tar on hot asphalt. As a young kid, I waited anxiously for the thunderstorms, so I could swim in the ditch behind our house. I knew it wasn’t really swimming but I was far away from the ocean. The lawn sprinkler was my other introduction to summer water sports. When I was a little older we joined the “Holiday Inn Swim Club” and my brother and I would swim all day for days on end. Once, I won third place in the floating contest. I remember trying hard to keep my legs in line with the rest of my body but they kept slipping underneath.

The weekend we found our apartment here in NY, there was a neighborhood block party. The hydrants were open and young kids ran through them with the same enthusiasm I used to have for the lawn sprinkler. I remember thinking that it was charming, like the Brooklyn seen in movies. Now we go to the movies to avoid the block party.

I don’t doubt that a New York summer can be legendary, filled with summer concerts, days in the park and outings to Coney Island. Though technically not summer but the first day of fall, one of my favorite NY experiences was being among the 65,000 people to see the Dalai Lama in Central Park in 2003. On a very hot day, thousands of people filled the park. They were polite to one another and all were filled with a similar curiosity and purpose. It was the calmest I have ever seen a huge group of New Yorkers. I wasn’t sure I was a New Yorker then. I have heard it takes at least five years. It has been almost six now.

A lot of our oldest friends are leaving New York for other, smaller towns, and soon we will follow. This city puts its mark on you. It chews you up and spits you out with the hopes that you will take its wisdom with you. Maybe my mark is slight, but I will feel it for years to come. I taste the city’s salt on my upper lip, and I know that it is this old salt that will continue to steer me in the foggy bay.

Pretty in Pink

2007-05-28T17:02:00.001-04:00

Photographic Memory

2007-05-17T10:33:00.000-04:00

I often wonder if my passion for taking and collecting snapshots prevents me from remembering actual events. Do I dump the information that exists outside of the frame of the image, believing that the photo has completely captured the event? My last order from Shutterfly was for over 1700 4x6 prints, almost all snapshots. The digital camera has launched my obsession to new heights and I am sure I am not alone. Just looking at Flickr for five minutes can attest to that. I don't post a lot of photos there and use Shutterfly as a tool for printing rather than as a means to distribute images to others.

Sometimes I worry if there was a natural disaster I wouldn't know what to take, because I have too many pictures, not just my own, but also extended family history and found photos. They wouldn't all fit in the one bag usually dedicated for such solemn occasions. We once had a roommate who worried of a similar problem. What would she take in one one bag, because, at the end of the world, the aliens wouldn't allow more than one per person on the spaceship. I used to think she was crazy, but now I might be like her, insisting that my photos are worth the additional baggage. Maybe the aliens can leave someone behind.

In a very recent blog commenting correspondence, my great friend Subburdenite recalls a day, 14 years ago, with such detail I am left checking my memory for details I might have filed away. I hope I am filing them and not simply forgetting. I was touched by the fact that she remembered with such specificity. I know she covets photos as well, but not quite in the same way I do. Maybe that is why she is such a great writer. She takes notes while not taking pictures. They are not physical notes on paper but mental ones.

She recalls the day:

"You were with me, long ago, before you two moved out to California (and then back to East Coast) when I purchased a Mission of Burma compilation. It was the week you cut your hair short on Haight Street and bought a book by Banana Yoshimoto. I think it was Kitchen which which was translated into English in 1993, so...I bet it was 1993. We sat on Jeff and Kim's living room floor in Oakland and looked at the inner album photographs for a good while."

And I found the photo, taken in the record store, right after my haircut:

2. To provide with explanatory or decorative features

2007-05-13T14:51:00.000-04:00

When I was studying painting, my instructors and classmates used illustration as a dirty word. When I proudly displayed my work for critique, they would refer to it as illustrative and peer at me with worried eyes. I never understood why it was an insult and I still don't. Why did they feel bad for me that my images were identifiable and sometimes (the other dirty word) didactic. Perhaps I was wrongly intending on illustrating images which were already clearly represented in my photographs. At the time it seemed very important to tackle the art of the brush, not the lens.

Today, I take great pleasure in enjoying the art of the illustrator. I can spend hours clicking on image after image on various websites. Here are some highlights from today's click session on Illustration Mundo:

Julien Pacaud
Bethan Algieri
Eduardo Recife
Maria Luisa Isaza
Olaf Hajek
Daniel Chang
Huan Tran
Christopher Silas Neal

Looking for Art

2007-05-10T12:03:00.000-04:00

I went to Chelsea on Tuesday to look at art. It was one of those days where I was working hard to find something I liked. I did see a couple exhibits that were interesting, but not so much that I want to jabber about them here. The best art I witnessed, not intended as art but mere functionality, was this peephole made out of scotch tape. A masterpiece.

More Rescued Pictures

2007-05-05T11:49:00.000-04:00

On my recent trip to TX I found some great old photos at the Jefferson Antique stores. I spent a little more on these top two because I was so intrigued. I did a little google searching and found out what is possibly going on. It seems to be a military tradition called Pollywog to Shellback which takes place when a ship crosses the equator. The costumes are wonderful.
The officers made an early slip 'n slide.
These three were in a batch from Iowa but many of the photos were taken in Long Beach CA. The CA might indicate that these young men played sports for a CA college. I tried to do some research online but became overwhelmed about how many sports teams there are sport the letter C on their caps. A few boys in this shot are sporting such a cap.
I love this picture because the photographer's shadow is in the shot and the subjects legs fade into the glare. Maybe it was just a mishap in the darkroom, but interesting nonetheless.
This sheep is just handsome.
If you aren't looking the closely at this shot, the people fade into the mountain.
I convinced myself that this picture and a few others in the stack were taken by a professional. The scan doesn't really do it justice. The paper quality is much different than all the others. Based on the one sentence of information packaged with the photos, the family is the Graham family of Spaulding Iowa. I even found a bit of their genealogy which mentions the Long Beach connection. I just can't figure out how the pictures got to TX. These pictures were hidden in a blue cabinet with multiple drawers. The cabinet was for sale not its contents. I decided it was necessary to open every drawer and found the college theater pictures. I should have remembered to write down the origin of the images which I saw in one of the drawers. But based on my detective work, using a dusty loupe on the image below, I am guessing this is the Alpha Psi Omega theater group from Centenary College (my mom's alma mater). I love this strange little tea party.
I know this photo was taken too long ago to be Cats, but everyone in this photo looks feline. Of my Jefferson finds, this one is my favorite. I think I might have a very similar vacation shot of my brother. I am going to have to look for it. The only problem is Pikes Peak is in CO and I don't think we ever went there on a family vacation.
I am very attracted to group event photos. So many of the images from this era are overly staged, but occasionally there are gems like this that capture the bustling activity.
This photo reminds me of Maine. It also looks mysteriously like this pier at Imperial Beach in CA. Ive never been to Imperial Beach and I guess a lot of piers look alike.
This image of a wagon train is excellent. I don't think I ever had a little red wagon, but now I want one of these wooden ones.
OK, so, why am I not a photo researcher? Maybe because I have simply been enjoying the images for their beauty, composition and for their connection to people and places in time I will never know. I see something in their eyes, their body language or just the way they exist within the frame. I am intrigued by what they are doing. It is often like reading a good book and not being able to put it down. I like reading images, but I think it is has been a fairly subconscious talent, not one I have honed or nurtured. The photograph reminds me that something has come before me, a series of events has previously taken place that allows me to be who I am. These are just memory triggers from someone else's experience, and yet, they connect me to my own.

Is it finally Spring?

2007-04-23T14:56:00.000-04:00

Uncertain

2007-04-16T22:54:00.000-04:00

I just got back from seeing my mom in Uncertain TX. It is a tiny little town on Caddo Lake.
She has a great studio and is an artist full time, but this week she was "off duty". These are the animals of Uncertain. Schooner rules the roost. The backyard looks out on to the lake. The roadside is filled with beautiful wildflowers.We went to nearby Jefferson to check out the antique stores. A friend of mine once said Pennsylvania was the land of the big glasses. I think it might be TX.Robert took us for a boat ride on the lake. I was too early to see the water lilies and lotus bloom, but in June they fill the lake. This section of the lake is called the river. We saw snakes in here but turtles reign in the rest of the lake.

The lake can be haunting and beautiful,
And the wildlife is abundant.

Riding through the lake is like existing within a film set. It feels otherworldly.
My mom and I stopped by the crawfish boil on the way to seek out more antiques.
We stopped by Beauty and the Book
And said howdy to a horse.On my mom's property, there are remnants of hunting days gone by.
Lizards find refuge in rusty springs and the sounds of the varied wildlife is constant.

Easter

2007-04-09T21:45:00.000-04:00

On Sunday we went to our friends' place for Easter brunch. After O + H finished their eggs, they each partook in a healthy serving of chocolate.The celebration continued. "Hey, look. It's the plus sign"Alice took a nap on my back,
While Don cracked us up with his egg decorating artistry.
We all dyed some eggs
And some hands.Penny lounged in the other room.Lucy practiced her cable maintenance techniques.
Alice posed for the eager photographer.
It was a good day.

Did I mention it was snowing outside?! That was weird.

Just Lollygagging

2007-04-04T09:57:00.000-04:00

The Decemberists and My Brightest Diamond

2007-03-22T11:41:00.000-04:00

Last night we went to see the Decemberists and My Brightest Diamond at the Landmark Lowes Jersey Theater in Jersey City, NJ. The venue is a historic theater, which is currently in the process of being renovated. It is full of gold filigree and light.

I wasn't familiar with My Brightest Diamond, but they were great and the lead singer, Shara Worden has an amazing and haunting voice. After her performance Don rushed out to the lobby to get her CD. I have been listening to it all morning. The Decemberists sounded fantastic as well. It was nice to see them live. Colin Meloy was a gracious, humble and friendly host. The band sounded amazing and each member has his or her own unique talents.

Early Birds

2007-03-17T14:05:00.000-04:00

Red Beans and Black Tapioca

2007-03-14T17:49:00.000-04:00

There is nothing better to turn my mood around than a trip to Chinatown for a red bean bun and a coconut tapioca tea. I am a huge fan of sweet red bean and enjoy it in many varieties, the bun, the mooncake, the roll, dumpling, ice cream, and daifuku. I was originally introduced to the red bean in 1986 at "International Market" in Nashville TN. It may seem like an unlikely place to fall in love with the azuki bean , but I have been a huge fan ever since.

The bubble tea is a newer beverage of choice and I do not have it as frequently as the red bean items. This time I enjoyed a icy coconut concoction and ate every last "pearl".

I visited several curio shops and believe I found the source of some of the items I usually buy at Swallow. I made some successful purchases, which I will not picture here, because they are for a certain somebody's birthday.

My apartment is making me crazy

2007-03-13T16:49:00.000-04:00

Apartment living is never fun but now it is just making me insane. If it isn't one neighbor's obsessive smoking and loud drunken behavior, it is another's load music. I don't care if it is classical. It sounds like it is in my living room and is vibrating the walls. And when I go to your door to ask you to turn it down, you don't answer. Can I ask where you learned your manners and basic decency. This is an old building with thin walls and we all have chosen to live here, for one reason or another. Is it such a big feat to ask to live in peace? I know you are not reading this and it is pointless to put my gripes here, but I am irritated. Just be quiet! Oh, and by the way, did you open up a bowling alley or are you just fond of redecorating by throwing your furniture across the room?

And you, the ones still hogging parking spots at my friend's place in Oakland, learn to park . And don't be ridiculous. Your car is not that fabulous.

Today, I feel like this...

2007-03-09T14:02:00.000-05:00

Mega Zilch

2007-03-06T23:28:00.000-05:00

I bought 3 Mega Millions lottery tickets in hopes of winning the over 370 million dollar jackpot. I wasn't sure the protocol for purchase and had to be guided by the helpful but unenthused shop owners. I am sure they saw me as some poor sucker throwing my money away on a whim. After waiting while I chose my numbers, they gestured at the paper, indicating that I should choose between a lump sum payment or the installment plan. I eagerly and loudly indicated that "I'll take it all!" I briskly left the store and walked into the frigid air, dreaming of my new found wealth. I was buying houses for myself and all my loved ones, starting an artist in residence program that is absolutely free, hiring chefs to cook fabulous meals, traveling to all the places I have never been, and giving money away like candy. But now... I am still a hopeful artist hoping to continue to stretch out the extended life of my last paycheck.

I made a website

2007-02-26T11:12:00.000-05:00

With my fancy new computer and iweb, I made a website. Thanks to those of you who gave your support to this reluctant "web designer". I have only checked it out on the mac, so you pc users are on your own, but I hope it still looks good.

February in California

2007-02-19T18:38:00.000-05:00

We just got back from a trip to CA which was happily extended by a few days compliments of Jet Blue.
We spent the first three nights in San Francisco with our pals Joy and Pete.
Joy introduces us to her neighborhood creamery. She screams for ice-cream.In the morning they treat us to a high class breakfast.While D is busy with Ray, I explore some of my old stomping grounds.
I am reminded that flowers do grow in February,And wildlife can thrive in an urban environment.This ocean sits in the fog and has its own unique character.After a long day we enjoy a home cooked meal with genuine faux meatballs.We revisit the DeYoung Museum and along the way admire some of our favorite trees.The city can be seen from a nine story tower and the homes seem to exist on proper scale with the landscape.The Academy of Sciences is being rebuilt across the courtyard.We join Subburdenite for lunch near her Berkeley office. She is also busy house sitting these crazy cats on the other side of the bay. Joy is friendly with all the cool cats.Katey shows off her prowess.On the next night we meet Broken Duck and other old friends for dinner at Zazie.Allen shares some tunes. He is the master of new music.Sunday morning, the first order of business is brunch at Universal Cafe.Then for more caffeine at Blue Bottle Coffee.We watch dogs in the new green space in Hayes Valley. Off to Golden Gate Park.
Ivy Girl gains powers from the foliage.Vacation is not complete without at least one donut run.Bellys full, we venture to Cesar Chavez park where we are greeted by many of these fine fellows. We make our way to the Secret Garden Cottage in Inverness.After a few days of rain the sun finally shines on Drakes Beach.
The morning brings more sunshine.Pt. Reyes is a wonder by the sea.
We go looking for the Tule Elk and end up at McClures BeachIn this area, the cattle ranches are plentiful, but it is odd to see so many cows living by the sea, Where the elephant seals sun themselves on the beachAnd deer roam by the roadside.I am easily amused by the port-a-potty graffiti... Hey, what happened to my yellow crayon...The Cliff House isn't the same since Musee Mecanique closed at this location, but the view of Ocean Beach is still spectacular.
It is a cold day for a swim but these guys are not deterred. Before my very eyes, Don is morphing into a sea creature.
We visit Pier 39
And the sea lionsOur flight is delayed and we spend an afternoon in Tilden Park.
This is the biggest slug we have ever seen.
The next day I feel crappy and spend the day resting. Later Michelle escapes work early to visit Champ. And to prepare us for our venture to Crixa Cakes. It is worthy of all the excitement. This is the free speech board on the Berkeley campus. I find it funny that it is completely free of speech.
The tower of my brother's alma mater.We make a drive south down the coast.
After visiting Half Moon Bay, we stop at San Gregorio State Beach.
And this beach with no name. We park by a ranch with a white fence and walk down the hill to the water.One last glimpse of Golden Gate Park before we finally fly home.
Until next time, California. You will be missed.You look simply beautiful to me.

Technology Overload

2007-02-01T22:47:00.000-05:00

I have completed creating a website with iWeb and now I am ready to put it out there in the world. Trouble is, I am a visual person and iWeb is a fairly intuitive visually based program, not a high-tech venture. In all my google searches for understanding, I have found people complaining about the sloppiness of the code with in iWeb. I do not want to post to a mac.com and will be getting my own site name. Blah blah. I'm already bored with this.....Anyway, I am finding that I need a FTP something or other which I think I successfully downloaded. I am at the point where a technology wizard would be handy.

I don't want to be one of those giggly shoulder shrugging girls who is afraid of technology, but I can only take it in small doses. I was late cell phone user and have friends still don't carry cells, and proudly. I was proud too, but now like the convenience. I just got an IM account and I have to say it is a little fun but a real time waster. I will not be getting a "CrackBerry". I don't like to mimic other people's misfortune with drug use and hate nicknames (despise acronyms), but I do understand this drug reference. Those hand held devices make people crazy. They are always typing furiously with their thumbs, waiting for the next call or email, always self important and in a hurry, ringing through meetings and on busy sidewalks.

When did we get so needy for attention, and when did it all go virtual? I miss the days my hands cramped from writing 20 page letters to great friends. Or my ear would turn bright red from the phone receiver being held there too long. Or when I wanted to show someone my photography, I got out a box and turned picture after picture while my companion looked on. Or when I would see how many pages I could read while my color photograph inched its way through the many rollers of the processor. Now I suffer from the need for immediate gratification, a product of my generation, a cliche.

This makes me think of a lecture on Obliscence, Theories of Forgetting and the Problem of Matter given by David Wilson of the Museum of Jurassic Technology. The basic premise was something about forgetting our experiences before they even occur. It was brilliant. Do you think David Wilson has a cell phone? I think he might use two cans and a ball of string. Maybe he paints itty bitty messages on the end of matchsticks and you have to have a special decoding magnifier to read them.

Along the Gowanus

2007-01-24T17:15:00.000-05:00

Birds

2007-01-22T13:11:00.000-05:00

King Vitaman Remembers

2007-01-18T11:12:00.000-05:00

It was still the 1970s and the shirt I was wearing was most likely made of some highly flammable polyester. I remember a particularly bright yellow striped number that was my favorite, often paired with a skort for a full fashion ensemble. I thought I was hot stuff in the skort because it showed off my leg muscles, toned due to much bicycling, swimming and gymnastics. I remember even tensing my thigh to highlight the muscle that would quickly turn to a more amorphous shape in my adult years. I accessorized with a silver snake choker with red rhinestone eyes.

While my outfit came from my grandmother's yard sale finds, my brother Jeff's came from the Sears catalogue. He sported brown toughskins, which would meet their demise when my mom decided it would be proper to scroll "play pants" in permanent marker on the right pant leg. His pants would later be replaced by a hand made polyester Easter leisure suit.

Well into our late 20's, my grandmother still would recall the night, at her friend’s dinner party, that that Jeff refused to eat gazpacho and exclaimed, “who ever heard of cold soup?!” She remembered the sound he made as he spit it out and was not afraid to mimic it at inopportune times. The host was a pirate, a man who lived on his boat in the bay and sported a hook for a hand. He was one of my grandmother's good friends. Grandma and her husband Bill taught bridge on the Princess cruise lines, so they enjoyed the boating types. I had never met anyone like him and I was fascinated. He had a waterbed with a brown, quilted velveteen spread and he was happy.

I don't really remember if I ate the soup or not. I don't remember if I was polite or followed my brother's lead. What I do remember is that this man was wonderful and strange and lived by the sea. He lived his life as he pleased and my grandmother was delighted to know him. I have no pictures of the captain or the boat, so I know that this memory is my own and not one from photos. As a kid, had I been allowed to eat Captain Crunch, I would have thought of him while eating my morning cereal. Instead, I begrudgingly ate my King Vitaman and would forget him until later in life. Once remembered, I would ask my grandmother about him. Her answer never revealed her friend's unique attributes and always remained the mimicked sound of my brother pretending to vomit.

Keane on Photobooth

2007-01-16T11:41:00.000-05:00

Anyone who grew up in the 70's remembers all the big eyed art which most of us found quite creepy. Turns out, Margaret Keane, the queen of this style is still cranking out the art. Good for her. I discovered I can make my own version using photobooth and photoshop. Seems I have a lot of time on my hands.....

Panning for Gold

2007-01-15T15:44:00.000-05:00

My husband had a dream that we lived in an apartment that existed in two states, with one half in New York and the other in California. Although I did not have this dream myself, it is often the state of my mind. Since hearing of this, I contemplate the idea often. Is the California side filled with thriving plants and sunny colors and the New York side dull with age and lackluster in its décor? I don’t think it is that simple.

As a child I visited my grandmother in Oakland CA. She was a stern and eccentric woman who I didn’t understand until well into adulthood. She had friends with hooks for hands and pianos as lovers. She shopped exclusively at yard sales and never bought anything new. Christmas gifts came in wallpaper from the 1940s and they always came late. But her home always contained something enchanting. It sat high on a hill overlooking the bay. From up there all was magical and wonderful. While she had me busy with household chores, I dreamed of my adult life in San Francisco, where houses were pink and people were strange. It wasn’t like the brown wood paneled southern home of my youth. People wore flowers in their hair and strange men in orange sheets handed out pamphlets in public squares. Escalators came out of the ground on to busy city streets and the sun shone bright through the fog. My grandmother assured me repeatedly that it was nothing to see. She also said the Grand Canyon was just a big hole in the ground. I later learned she was lying. Maybe she wanted to keep me from dreaming or to keep me close and teach me well. Whatever her logic, California never left my mind.

At 18 I had the opportunity to move to the Golden State. I lived in Santa Barbara in an apartment that had a view of the mountains and the ocean and I thought it was paradise. I was living as a beach lover and ice-cream scooper. I had aspirations of being an artist, but then, like now, I didn’t know quite how. My friends were all students of photography and film and I was often the subject of their class assignments. When not posing for pictures, I learned about beach barbeques and walks though the hills. Flowers rained on the ground like stars in a black sky. Their smell was enchanting. I never wanted to leave but my two-dollar shoes never carried me very far.

After being away from CA for several years I went back at 25. I moved to San Francisco and contemplated my attraction to it. I made art about my dream state, trying to thread together an altered and somewhat heightened reality. I was a miner panning for gold and looking for a pristine garden. Still, I fell in love with the idea of the place and it never left me. I found fault with it and it broke my heart.

I don’t want to fall prey to my dreams. I want to be happy, content. For now I live on the east coast side of my reality. I live with an eastern seabird who carries my soul in his heart. My mind still lives west in a place that falls off the edge of the coast. I am a fool and I am longing, a lazy sea otter waiting for a wave to carry me home.

The Vapors

2007-01-08T10:28:00.000-05:00

Remember back when New York smelled like a fresh stack of pancakes? Now it smells like natural gas. Every five minutes they report a new origination location. The main focus point is West 4th and Bleecker, one block from my old office. The gas company doesn't detect any leaks. Another theory is that a nearby factory might be emanating a similar smell to the scent that is added to natural gas.

New Mac!

2007-01-06T12:43:00.000-05:00

My sweet goober husband surprised me with a new MacBook yesterday. Now we won't have to bicker over computer time because we each have our own laptops. What a nice gift! Today we are setting it up and playing with all the gadgets. The photobooth, like most photobooths, is fun and goofy.

Wedded Bliss and New Year Cheer

2007-01-02T15:01:00.000-05:00

Our friends Micki and Harley were married on New Year's Eve at the New York City Fire Museum. It was a beautiful, fun wedding and a great way to spend the holiday.

Maureen is one hot momma and America's next top model.
Matt and Melissa came to town from their new home in KS. We were happy to see them.

Micki decorated the space with these wonderful cranes. Late in the evening we all chose our favorite crane to send a special wish to the bride and groom.
Micki is a sparkling bride.

The first dance and some fancy footwork.

Bill and Laura tear up the dance floor.

Harley takes a break to enjoy the great food
While Micki shares her new wedded bliss.
Ned takes it all in.

The band takes a short break and this young man is amazing on the keyboards.
The midnight hour approaches and Bill and Laura take a break to cool their heels.
Matt and Maureen snuggle up to 2007.
Don shares some instant memories
And a laugh with a great old friend.
Micki and Harley get ready to ring in the new year.

Laura leads us in a good hoot and holler.

Don makes some noise.

The night turns to morning.
We happily welcome 2007 and wish you and yours all the best in the new year.

Let us be grateful to people who make us happy; they are the charming gardeners who make our souls blossom. - Marcel Proust

Happy New Year

2007-01-01T12:14:00.000-05:00

Last night we went to a very nice wedding which had a photobooth that was being used to create a wonderful guest book. The happy couple received half of the 6 shots and the guests were given the other half. I was tempted to spend all night playing in the photobooth but I refrained.

Feliz Navidad

2006-12-28T14:08:00.000-05:00

Eight adults and one very sweet baby spend the Christmas holiday in Playa del Carmen Mexico.

After a long day of travel we explore the beach which is only steps away from the house.

We trek into town to get some dinner

and enjoy the music of the mariachis.

Casa Salsa is not ready so, for a day, we enjoy Casa Iguana which has its own pool. Katherine takes her first swim.

Jeff and I explain the underwater games of our youth.
Don swims backwards.
The next day we say bye to the pool and move to Casa Salsa.

Dad tries his hand at a game of poker.

The next morning I try my hand at being a lucha libre.

The neighborhood is full of Mayan ruins and the well rooted trees.
We take a ride to Tulum to see more ruins. Before entering we witness the voladores in action.

Dad shows us where we are on the map.
Los gatos look on.
Katherine learns about her ancient ancestors.
The iguanas try to disguise themselves off as ancient stones.
Alex and Lindsey enjoy the beautiful landscape.
Dad and Don smile for the eager photographer.
After taking it easy for a day,
We head to Cozamel for some sun and snorkeling.
We take a break for lunch and cerveza.
Dad tells Katherine all about the fishes,
While I explore the deep.
Alex and Lindsey take a siesta in the hamacas.
Back at the casa this bird is our new best friend.
Christmas morning in Mexico.
Dad and Shirley say goodbye to the beach.
Feliz Navidad to you and yours.

Adios to sweet Katherine, truely the star on the top of the tree.

Caught ON DUTY

2006-12-13T10:36:00.000-05:00

My close friend Irene was visiting last weekend and as we were out and about she caught me in action. She said that as a working artist many galleries, grant givers, and the like, are interested in the process. My process is not that complex. I carry a point and shoot camera and when I see something that strikes me I take a shot or two. Now that I quit my day job(!), I will have time to filter through all the images I have taken the past few years and finally do something with them. Does this mean I have to change my blog name? I am also going to attend the geeky free classes at the mac store to improve some of my digital imaging skills. Another friend recommended that I not stay home and eat twinkies all day. I’ll see what I can do...

Picture Perfect

2006-12-03T23:05:00.000-05:00

I have been spending most of the night trying to upload my photos on to Shutterfly only to find that they aren't loading. I am 5 months behind on loading my pictures and you might ask why this is a problem. Well...I'll tell you. I am addicted to having the physical prints and the digital files are not enough for me. I am simultaneously checking out Kodakgallery to see if it loads any faster. Several of my pals have informed me that Flickr has the option to print photos but I haven't tried that yet. I am annoyed that they have so many limits and want to take a whopping $25. for the service of organizing my photos. I know $25 is nothing when I have given hundreds to Shutterfly and whiled away my hours searching for photo albums to house my pictures. It only occurred to me recently to question how long these digital prints might last. Are they no better than a color xerox, a carbon copy a Sunday comic turned yellow with age? Am I a fool for being so nostalgic, having a fear of forgetting, believing that the photographic image holds some sort of inevitable truth?

Subburdenite Takes a Bite of the Big Apple

2006-11-28T21:54:00.000-05:00

Subburdenite came to town to celebrate turkey day with us and to paint the town red. It was her first trip to this neck of the woods and these are some of the highlights. I am sure there will be more on her plot of the blogosphere.

We make the trek from Brooklyn to Manhattan by walking over the Brooklyn Bridge.

M makes a quick call and even gets mistaken by an angry cyclist as an annoying cell phone user. She still doesn't own a cell, honest!

We stop for a little spin on the ice and some tree trimming.

Big D shows M all the ins and outs of the subway.

Mainly, we do lots and lots of walking.

We meet some really grumpy pumpkin heads and prove our allegiance to their cause.

M sets her sights on D's meal of thanks and giving.

D and M love a good video game.

But quickly dissolve into nerdome....

Our young friends, O+H, show M around DUMBO and how to enjoy a good hot chocolate.

Some days the sun shines brightly.

M is content to stay in NY but must return to CA.

We are sad to see her go.

New Seeds

2006-11-19T19:05:00.000-05:00

I am plotting for my new year which I hope will turn this off duty artist into an on duty one. The "studio" has been closed for years now and I need to figure out how to open it with a limited budget and supplies. I am happy to report that the highlight of my work day will no longer be adding yet another rubberband to my office art project. I keep reminding myself that in the new year I will be free from the desk and from the endless monotony. No doubt, I will find another place to while away the hours, but, briefly, I will just be me, not defined by my workplace or its dysfunction. I will be looking internally for pieces that are buried under layers of administrative angst.

What was it?

2006-11-12T13:10:00.000-05:00

Last night we went to see Crispin Glover at Anthology Film Archive. He read/performed from several of his books and showed his Film "What is it?" He did a long Q & A after the film and did not really answer any of the questions asked. He danced around topics and kept speaking about his taboo subject matter. Sorry Mr. Glover but the film was just bad. I think perhaps it isn't getting funding because of this, not that it is so avant-guard that no one wants to fund it. I have been a fan of Crispin Glover for a while but now I am not impressed. His slide show was entertaining enough but I was overall disappointed. He claimed the film was not about shock value and claimed to have respect for his actors and yet never called them by their names. I was convinced he never learned them. He used extreme iconography and never gave it a context. He just seemed to have had a weird dream and put it on film, but sadly this doesn't make it great art, not even mediocre.

Fishing for Pilgrims

2006-11-05T22:33:00.000-05:00

Oh dear friend, who will visit us upon the days of cornucopia and mirth, feast your eyes upon this fine altar of thanks and giving.

Boys of Old

2006-10-29T23:29:00.000-05:00

Pink with Sprinkles

2006-10-09T13:40:00.000-04:00

Normally, I don't create two posts in one day but this image seemed fitting with the last. It is just a sweet bit of loveliness.

Breaking Bread and Eating Art

2006-10-09T12:17:00.000-04:00

On Saturday we spent the day with our pals from Beacon looking at art in Chelsea. There was an unusual amount of forlorn baked goods sprinkling the streets and sidewalks in front of the galleries.

Toast

James Everett Stanley at Freight and Volume

Chocolate Cake

Alessandra Sanguinetti at Yossi Milo

Roll with Jam

Esko Mannikko at Yancey Richardson

Baguette

Alessandra Exposito at Mixed Greens

After all the art viewing and stumbling on breadcrumbs, we had a delightful time at the Wild Lily Tearoom.

Direction

2006-09-30T15:53:00.000-04:00

Every morning, on my way to work, I walk through a little alley toward a too expensive coffee shop. Often the alley smells and I ask myself why I keep walking through it. Sometimes I think it is because I pass the dogs at the doggy daycare, running around playfully or quietly sleeping in the window. Seeing them calms me before the monotony of the office. It is the fascination of reading their temporary collars which sport their dog names combined with their human surnames. I walk though the alley out of habit, usually reading my book, not noting my surroundings. This week I am prompted by a question asked of me by the sidewalk. "Where are you going?" I am equally delighted and annoyed at the inquiry. Does it address my physical placement on the city grid or my metaphorical place in the world? Is it trying to address my seeming lack of direction and my wavering sense of focus? My pondering becomes quickly squelched by a hectic and somewhat chaotic work day. Each day following, I move through; the sidewalk inquires.

The Science of Moviegoing

2006-09-24T15:45:00.000-04:00

Last night we went to see Science of Sleep which is a movie I highly recommend. It is a playful and sweet story and would touch any creative soul who has a little trouble with waking life. Sometimes dreams take us places we can't otherwise visit and letting go of that in the morning is sometimes difficult. We create more interesting realities in our dreams and this film touches on that as well as looking cleverly at the soul of a tender hearted artist.

The Show-Me State

2006-09-23T11:51:00.000-04:00

I went to St. Joseph MO last weekend for my dad's 65th birthday party. He isn't retired quite yet but hopes to be soon. I also was able to meet my new niece for the first time.

The flowers in my dad's backyard

bring out the wildlife.

The first night we went to BB's Lawnside BBQ in Kansas City. This is John Paul of John Paul's Flying Circus.

The second night we went to ride the ferris wheel at a local high school carnival.

Jeff helps gather flowers at the farmers market.

Katherine and Kim wake up after resting from the long car ride.

This is Katherine's first travel experience.

Harry wonders what all the commotion is about.

Dad gets ready for the party,

where everyone eats lots of great food and drinks lots of fine wine (and some really good homemade cherry liquor). Dad and Shirley throw a good shindig.

We all can't quit looking our newest family member.

The morning after the party we drink lots of coffee and eat left over flourless chocolate cake for breakfast. Don't worry, we ate some eggs too.

Adoration

2006-09-19T17:15:00.000-04:00

Meet Dan Bummer, love of my life.

London Holiday

2006-09-07T23:09:00.000-04:00

We stayed in an area of London called Spitalfields.

We took a walk along the Thames and found this group of bikers and skaters along the way.

Houses of Parliament

Tate Modern

We aren't religious folk but, in order to see the inside, we went to a service at Westminster Abbey.

The Natural History Museum

Careful now...

The Collections

This is a small natural history museum which will remain unnamed because I promised that the images would not be posted online. We discovered this one after visiting the Hunterian Museum which was amazing and did not allow photography.

The London Eye is a fantastic ferris wheel giving fabulous views of the city.

Kew Gardens

Portobello Road Market

Sissinghurst Castle Garden, Kent

National Gallery

There is more but these are some of the highlights. We really enjoyed this trip. We had a very kind and welcoming host (a friend from a previous film festival trip); we ate great food (yes, I said great food), saw a lot of sights and drank more tea than we usually do. The street markets were more than I could have wished for and I even bought some nice jewelry on the last day. London is expensive but not as expensive as I heard it would be. All the museums were free, and had I gone to the doctor when I banged my knee the first night, that would have been free too. We also saw the new film by Pedro Almodovar, Volver, and I highly recommend it. Overall generalization is that the people in London were nice and the city was clean, very civilized, not like old stinky town.

Notes from Across the Pond

2006-09-05T22:43:00.000-04:00

We just got back from London yesterday and it was a great trip. I started to work on a few photos to post here but a bit of jet lag is making it problematic to stay up any longer. But soon....

Playing Hooky at the Bronx Zoo

2006-08-22T20:55:00.000-04:00

Last Friday I skipped out on work to go to the zoo with Don and a long time good friend and her two fantastic boys. The zoo is huge and we barely made a dent in terms of seeing all the animals, but it was well worth the day off.

We hung out with the turkeys,

turtles

and prairie dogs.

We enjoyed the company of lemurs

and monkeys.

The "kids" took a nice break for ice-cream

and kibble.

We all dreamed of elephants.

Arrested Sleep

2006-08-14T20:41:00.000-04:00

David Cross takes a load off in the Crate and Barrel.

Yesteryear in Pictures

2006-08-12T13:16:00.000-04:00

I received an early birthday gift from my mother-in-law. She sent me a fabulous old photo album which had the extra bonus of loose images shoved between the pages. I love old pictures and could spend the majority of my days looking at them. Funny that I never became a photo researcher or archivist. Here are some highlights from this batch of pictures.

New York Aquarium

2006-07-29T12:32:00.000-04:00

Summer Reads

2006-07-23T10:17:00.000-04:00

This was a gift from a friend who knows of my fondness for Tom Waits. It gives a little insight into his world and his creative mind.

A coming of age story about one woman's often confused relationships.

This was another thoughtful gift from another friend who knows I like stories that are a bit quirky. I really shoudn't give anything away here about the plot... It is a sort of science fiction turned love story.

I just started this one today and I am really enjoying it. I picked it up because of the cover and yes sometimes that does matter.

Word to the Wise

2006-07-20T20:13:00.000-04:00

Today I got my third and last wisdom tooth removed. I wasn't as afraid as before and it went quickly. I did find myself pushing with my feet on the chair to maintain my balance and mainly this was due to the force with which my tooth was being removed. I imagined my tooth like roots of a tree being yanked unwillingly from the soil. But again I only listened to about half of a song on my iPod before the whole ordeal was over. As the doctor stitched me up he declared me "totally free of wisdom".

New Niece

2006-07-14T16:57:00.000-04:00

My brother is a DAD!! And I am an AUNT!

Mainers

2006-07-05T23:27:00.000-04:00

Recently my mother-in-law visited New York. She filled her days with the sites, sounds and smells of the city.

She squeezed in some museums as well.

She returned to Maine and I arrived there a few days later. Matt and Arie met us there and spent a couple days at the camp. Arie is showing me her fancy bubble blowing techniques.

Matt almost got stranded out on the dock but Don saved the day.

But he came out of the water with these strange looking claws.

The lazy girls relax in the lazy boy.

Beth and Jim joined us and the first stop was Red's Eats to test the Lobster rolls. I ate the grilled cheese.

Matt enjoys all that Red's has to offer but prefers the bread at the Sea Basket.

Before heading to Boston, Matt opens an internet cafe to make a little extra cash.

Beth and Jim relax on the dock and come out with normal looking fingers.

Don does some manual labor on the new tractor.

While Joe blow dries the deck.

Bugs live the good life here in Maine.

Hats off to a great fleamarket where we collectively bought 3 hats, a quilt, 2 photos, 3 cookbooks, a ceramic dog, and some doilies.

Beth listens as the local experts explain how to eat a lobster.

Three New Yorkers walk swiftly with carrots.

Baby birds find shelter within a low bush.

Family flurries after a hearty picnic.

And Jake takes solace in his new squeaky bone.

Vegan Hawkeye

2006-06-23T23:20:00.000-04:00

Last night after work I joined my husband and mother-in-law at Blossom, a vegan restaurant in Chelsea. I always feel like part of the New York experience is to randomly pass a star on the street. Our friends who visited last week saw John Malkovich. I thought surely, due to the filming of Spiderman 3 in our neighborhood, we would see Tobey Maguire. I had sort of given up on the idea of seeing a "movie star" when Ethan Hawke walked into Blossom during the dessert portion of our meal. I tried not to stare and noticed he was seated in an area that was slightly curtained, not so much that you couldn't see him, but enough for him to eat discretely. He was with a petite blonde that I didn't recognize. The staff seemed pretty familiar with them, a little fuss and chatting but not too much.

Pals from San Francisco

2006-06-20T23:04:00.000-04:00

Joy and Pete visited stinky town this past weekend, and we had fun like we used to in the old timey days of San Francisco.

Brooklyn is just like Hollywood. You just have to squint a little and use your imagination.

The girls are off getting crafty at the Renegade Craft Fair.

It's a bird; it's a plane; it's "architecture".

Cupcakes fill all the visitors with love.

This beautiful sunset followed a water taxi ride from Chelsea to Dumbo.

Don shows our guests how wonderful Brooklyn is.

"A rose is a rose is a rose"

2006-06-13T23:31:00.000-04:00

When we lived in Boston, we had a landlord named Rose and she was an older woman with strong opinions and a nosey nature. She was small in stature and always wore a housedress, which we referred to as her mumu. After signing our lease for that apartment, Rose wanted to make sure we were Catholic and that we would be cleaning our blinds on a regular basis. She found out quickly that we were artists and exclaimed how if she knew she would have never given us the apartment. For the three years we lived there we were not allowed to hang any art on the walls. Rose had a screen house we helped her put up in the summertime. Her husband would sit out there for maybe ten minutes the whole season and then, when it got cold, we would help them take it down.

Rose loved to peek out her blinds to see what the neighbors were up to and she hosed down the outside of house everyday. During winter when we shoveled she insisted that putting snow against the house would flood the basement. I never understood how she disconnected these two processes. During the holidays, she was very competitive with the woman across the street and was always distressed if she did not have the most ornamentation on the house. Rose watched for the mailman, watched the cars go by, watched us as we walked passed. She warned us of the hippies and told us that Harvard Square was unsafe. We could always see the curtains flutter as Rose failed at trying to be discreet about her lookyloo.

Now that we have been in New York for almost 5 years we have become a bit like Rose. We are a little bitter, a little nosey and a little peturbed by our neighbors on a consistent basis. If we catch each other looking out the window to the street, we ask "Hey Rose what's happening out there?" This weekend there will be much of this due to the rescheduled block party, which is always a fanciful treat. Rose wouldn't be happy that we use her name to define our anxious behavior, but in some ways maybe we miss her, or we just understand her apprehension. Occasionally, I remind myself to breathe and to stop to take a whiff of the flower that bears the same name. I hope that wherever she is now, she can do the same.

Unwise?

2006-06-02T14:14:00.000-04:00

Yesterday I got two of my three wisdom teeth taken out. I only have 3 not 4. I was very nervous about the procedure but it turned out to be not so bad. I was given lots of novocaine and the doctor made sure I was completely numb before taking any action. It was fast. I had brought my ipod because I thought it would help calm me down. I barely got through one Kings of Convenience song before the first tooth was out. The doctor said "first one is out" and I didn't respond. He said "did you hear me" and I said "yes, I just don't believe you" and he proceeded to show me the tooth. The bottom tooth needed a little more force and time but I must have been done with the whole thing in about 25 minutes or less. I have some stitches and the decision about when I want to get the third tooth out. I wonder why they call them wisdom teeth when they grow in so stupidly and almost always have to be yanked out. It can't be because you get them when you are older because most people have them out in their teens and early twenties. You certainly aren't that wise at that age. My grandmother had a wisdom tooth come in when she was in her 70s. I think at that point maybe she was truly wise but her wisdom was failing due to alzheimer's. My mouth feels better without these extra teeth. I guess I was biting my cheek more than I thought and now it feels like there is so much more room. I had offered to save the teeth for a friend who wants to use them as subject for a painting, but I didn't end up saving them. I just wanted it to be over and to get out of the chair, not to mention that one tooth had to be filed down before extraction. Sorry for not keeping them, but maybe he can paint pictures of my still attached teeth instead. I have a strange metallic taste in my mouth which seems to be slowly fading. Not sure what that is about but I will ignore it for now. My diet consists of soy pudding, soup in a box, fancy smoothy type juices, applesauce and yogurt. I am kind of enjoying eating all smooth foods. I won't try anything solid for another day or two. I didn't have to take any pain pills today and my face is not swollen, so kudos to the doctor.

Rising and Falling

2006-05-25T20:06:00.000-04:00

When I visit the ocean I always feel the need to collect rocks. I pick through them looking for something masterful, something beautiful. I find small stones that will fit in my pocket or not alarm anyone when I put them through security to get on the plane. They always calm me, like old friends. They remind me of the water. Sometimes I feel guilty for taking them away from the tide.

Headbanger-in-law

2006-05-23T22:28:00.000-04:00

This past weekend we went to Maine for my sister-in-law's wedding. One of the best parts of the wedding day was seeing my father-in-law dance to "You Shook Me All Night Long" by AC/DC (Back in Black 1980)

Springtime in Brooklyn

2006-05-13T19:43:00.000-04:00

Video Playground

2006-05-07T14:55:00.000-04:00

I am a litle late in discovering YouTube and have been looking at it all afternoon. There are so many cool videos to be found. It is like a video version of a box of found photos. There's lots of garbage but a few gems like this one. Be patient; it takes time to load. Maybe grab a coffee and come back to watch the wonder.

Well Suited

2006-04-30T21:49:00.000-04:00

Out of my most recent photo finds, this one is my favorite.

Still thinking about it....

2006-04-30T21:11:00.000-04:00

While looking for an old drawing today, I found this piece of notebook paper from the late 70's or early 80's. Seems I still haven't decided.

Giamatti on the Side

2006-04-23T18:01:00.000-04:00

Today we braved the pouring rain to go to brunch at Frankie's 457. About two thirds in to eating my grilled vegetable fritatta, I noticed Paul Giamatti (with family and/or friends) just two tables over. I wonder what is bringing the celebrities to this area of Brooklyn. Could it be one of the last episodes of Soprano's? Could it be Heath Ledger and Michelle Williams? Or is it the new Dunkin Donuts?

Feeling Blue

2006-04-15T12:44:00.000-04:00

So I clearly have an attraction to this color and have for quite some time. I recently went into West Elm only to find myself looking like a part of the floor model. When I used to paint, I always finished the tube of Cerulean Blue before any other tube. No matter how hard I tried to veer away from it I always went back. If it didn't fill the background, it filled a drawing in the foreground. There are splashes of this shade in my home, in my clothing, my jewelry, my photography and always in my mind. I guess I find it calming and somewhat pure like the water of a tropical ocean, the glimmer of scales on a fish, the flutter of a butterfly wing, the sky on an unusually beautiful day. I guess I am ok with popular culture owning it for a while, because that will pass and I continue to identify with it. I will always feel this particular shade of blue.

Fascination Bordering on Mania

2006-04-12T19:23:00.000-04:00

“Back home I poured over these pictures with a fascination bordering on mania, I found them irresistible, precious, the equivalent of holy relics. It seemed that they could tell me things I had never known before, reveal some previously hidden truth, and I studied each one intensely, absorbing the least detail, the most insignificant shadow, until all the images had become part of me. I wanted nothing to be lost.”
Paul Auster- The Invention of Solitude

These are the people in my neighborhood.

2006-04-09T22:46:00.000-04:00

So we were walking down Smith Street, which I didn't even want to walk down at this particular moment, and we passed this Italian place. This restaurant we have been a bit ambivalent about because they have accidentally poured olive oil down my back and the service is sometimes so-so. We still go there once in a while, but it is never the first place we think of. A bit of afternoon sunshine allowed the happy diners to sit outside. We passed and there was no mistaking the person in the tattered flannel quietly eating his meal with friends. It was Julian Schnabel. I pointed this out to Don by saying, "Did you see who that was?" "No" And then an excited, "Did you see?" He turned back to look and said, "You mean Dennis Hopper?" And sure enough, Dennis Hopper was his dining companion along with, who we believed to be, Mike Figgis.

Return to Buffalo

2006-04-03T20:12:00.000-04:00

This past weekend we returned to Buffalo, NY for the first time since leaving in 1994. We lived there while Don was in graduate school and made a hasty escape to San Francisco after. Buffalo has changed a little and now offers a fine cup of coffee which I couldn't get while living there. Both of the places I had worked have since closed down or moved. A couple fires took the favorite restaurant hangouts. There were still a few old standbys and some new places that Meg introduced us to. We were there for Don's screening at Squeaky Wheel. Some old friends came and we had a nice time reconnecting. We stayed at Meg's place with her friendly menagerie. She has a really nice house which she bought super cheap. You can do that in Buffalo and get a HUGE house. It was a nice little trip.

Meg's Menagerie

Our Old House. We lived on the first floor.

We went with Meg to her regular Saturday brunch with friends. They rotate spots every week, and this weeks' was at a greasy spoon, which I think was called Nick's.

Gail and Ann came from Toronto for the screening. We went to eat at Santasiero's, a great Buffalo Italian restaurant.

Don remembers the good old days.